Sometimes, when somebody tells me they think I’m making a remarkable recovery from my stroke, I answer in this way: Well, it didn’t kill me, so it must have made me stronger.
I think most people have probably heard a version of that quote: what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. I always thought I knew what the author of that quote meant by it, but not being a famous philosopher, maybe I don’t really get his actual meaning.
Yet, here’s what it means to me:
I don’t feel angry or bitter or sorry for myself.
When I experience a setback, I get back up and keep on fighting; the battle isn’t over until I win it.
I accept my condition as inescapable and constantly find ways to work around it or through it.
I consider myself a survivor and not a victim.
I hold my head up high, no matter what the challenge is.
I don’t wallow in self-pity and don’t accept pity from others.
I hold myself to a high standard and do everything within my current limitations to meet that standard; when I’m complimented on something I’ve done, I say this: I don’t expect anything less of myself.
I focus on my strengths and don’t dwell on my weaknesses.
I believe in myself, no matter what. I have total faith in myself.
I don’t allow my brain injury to rule my life or define who or what I am.
I show my strength in trying to do all that (and more) every day. My main superhero power is hanging in there and hanging on, no matter what.
So coming through a major stroke made me stronger, and even more so than I would have thought possible. Maybe I could call myself the Amazing TBI-Man, master of whatever life throws at me, more powerful than a severe traumatic brain injury.
I already have a costume; jeans, a T-shirt and sneakers.
But I’m not fighting this fight alone. I don’t know you, but if you’re a TBI survivor you no doubt are stronger too. Maybe we can all form a superhero team. The only membership requirement is to feel your own strength and celebrate it every day.
Let’s fight the good fight together, and let’s win it together.
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