
Category Archives: Brain Injury Awareness
Resilience
Being a TBI survivor, I know a thing or two about resilience myself. I get comments about my resilience all the time.
I think a lot of people are probably thinking about my physical resilience, how I’ve started to gradually walk again with some degree of the old poise and confidence I had before my brain was injured. Others tell me that if they didn’t know I was a survivor, they’d have never guessed.
I also think physical resilience is something most people can relate to. TBI survivors are certainly resilient, at least the ones I know; these people have survived horrific, debilitating and life-altering experiences with long-lasting effects, yet still get out of bed every day and live their new normal lives.
Let’s take the term resilience a little further.
One definition I found online for resilience is the ability to withstand adversity and bounce back and grow despite life’s downturns. Let’s go with this since it pretty much dovetails with my definition of resilience and my experience.
My take on my personal resilience is pretty simple at its heart. Resilience can be learned, but I think it would be hard to teach.
To me resilience isn’t bend, but don’t break. It’s more like this; bend, but also adapt and thrive, or something like that. That applies to all aspects of what makes me uniquely me, and to my recovery, which is uniquely mine. What I’m about to write is more about how I try to set myself up to be resilient than about resilience itself.
Apart from being physically resilient, I try to be mentally and emotionally resilient, and it’s not always easy to do. But I find it gets easier the more I flex those muscles.
Mentally and cognitively I try to exercise my brain every day. I spend at least two or three hours a day reading and at night I take walks and try to digest and process what I’ve learned that day. I like word games and playing with words. This kind of thing help, hopefully to keep my mind kind of nimble, sharp and agile and in the process feed my resilience.
Reading helps me to better see the world as it is, and from different points of view. That helps me be more realistic about the world and the way things really are, not just the way I wish things were. Reading gives me a window into the minds and perspectives of others, and that helps me think of alternate possibilities to approach new situations.
And of course there’s my work blogging. Finding topics to cover is an ongoing process that helps exercise my imagination, and oftentimes my curiosity will lead me to settle on a topic that requires I do research. This all helps (I hope) give me a mental workout and stay on top of things. Over the past few years I estimate I’ve written somewhere in the neighborhood of 300 essays, and it’s not just a way to exercise mental resilience. It also gives me a way to judge my mental progress when I look back at my earlier pieces.
I try not to approach new situations with my mind already made up about the problem and what I need to do to solve it. Getting the facts first is part of the flexibility I mentioned, the ability to adapt to new or changing situations.
But of course, there isn’t always time or opportunity to carefully weigh information and options; sometimes things just pop up out of the blue and force me to rely on instinct. But all the information I’ve absorbed throughout my life and experience gives me confidence in my instincts and my ability to improvise when I need to. I’ve had to constantly improvise throughout my recovery and doctors tell me I’ve been making some very good decisions.
All of those things contribute to what I consider my mental flexibility.
As for emotional resilience, another definition I found goes, in part, bouncing back from a stressful encounter and not letting it affect our internal motivation.
Moving on, part of what I consider my emotional resilience, is having an optimistic outlook, but also having a realistic view of the world. I realize I have to view the world as it is, not the way I wish it was. Of course there are certain things I can directly influence, but being realistic takes knowing what those things are.
Emotional resilience, in my view, helps us get through those times where we get blindsided by life. It sure comes in handy when I try to do something I used to be able to do and can’t yet—it’s not the end of the world. I don’t get angry and I don’t feel sorry for myself. It’s not failure, I just haven’t tried what will get me where I want to go yet—I just have to keep trying, and being confident it will happen eventually.
A huge part of my resilience in recovering is putting failures in perspective. I know it’s hard to do with a brain injury—I know because I’ve been there.
When things get to me, I have made it a habit to kind of subconsciously asking myself, is this so big a deal I would be upset about a month or a year from now? I ask myself, how big a deal is this compared to having a major stroke? I lived through one, so to me, if it doesn’t reach stroke levels, it’s nothing I need to dwell on. It’s what some people mean by don’t sweat the small stuff.
Carrying and reliving negativity is a drain on emotional resilience. It keeps you bogged down and mired in the muck, emotionally speaking. It ties up mental and emotional energy that you need for more important things. This is where optimism and a positive attitude work for me.
Another thing that keeps my emotional resilience in top working form is not taking on the emotional baggage of others. I’m told I am a caring and compassionate man. I willing to be there for people. That’s an important trait to have, but it’s also important not to take on someone else’s emotional distress. It’s not always easy to do, but I have to take care not to make their distress my own. Doctors, nurses and caregivers know how to do it—they can’t afford to let emotions get in their way, but they can still function in a caring and compassionate way.
For me, resilience also involves avoiding stress and stressful situations. I find doing that aids my resilience because avoiding stress keeps me from having to be resilient in the first place.
Being confident in myself and my ability to cope goes a long way in my recovery, but this is where my positive outlook butts up against reality sometimes. I have come to accept that there are things I can’t do or change. But I don’t let those things bring me down too much, because I realize, as good as I am, sometimes all I can do is let things go or wait them out—that doesn’t make me any less positive or confident. I have to remember to be patient because some things I can change are going to take some time.
In my mind I am a rock star, ready to take on whatever pops up. I roll with the punches and have total confidence I can handle it. But if it doesn’t happen right away I’m mentally, physically and emotionally resilient enough to keep getting back up until I win.
![]() | Isaac Peterson grew up on an Air Force base near Cheyenne, Wyoming. After graduating from the University of Wyoming, he embarked on a career as an award-winning investigative journalist and as a semi-professional musician in the Twin Cities, the place he called home on and off for 35 years. He doesn’t mind it at all if someone offers to pick up his restaurant tab and, also, welcomes reader comments. Email him at isaac3rd@gmail.com. Read more articles by Isaac here; https://www.brainenergysupportteam.org/archives/tag/isaac-peterson |
BEST in Second Life
Check out BEST in Second Life, virtual world support for the individuals and communities.
Our programs offer peer and caregiver support, educational opportunities, special events and activities and more much.
It’s free and all are welcome!
Click here to start your journey today!
Visualizations and Affirmations
When I was on my month-long hospital stay after a stroke, I began my self-help program while I was still laying flat on my back in bed.
I believe what I did there was the real start of my recovery.
My body didn’t work right and my brain was still scrambled, but I was still able to do some visualization and I believe that made all the difference.
I remember a few times someone told me something about things I could or couldn’t do. I always rejected that. I would say, sometimes out loud, No, it’s not going to be like that. I had no doubts I would have more power over my circumstances than they were telling me I would.
What I was doing was not accepting the negative framing of my recovery—I insisted on making my own reality. Since that time, I’m told over and over again how remarkable the rate of my recovery has been. I credit a few things for that, visualization and affirmations, being two big ones.
Here’s how visualization and affirmations work, in a nutshell.
Visualization is just that; forming a clear picture in your mind of whichever positive result you want in your life and believing completely that you get that result. Visualizing doesn’t necessarily mean having a crystal clear image: it can be enough just to be able to feel it, the more strongly the better.
After that, you energize that image through repetition and having no doubts you can attain it.
Here’s how it works.
First, get into a relaxed state, sitting, lying down, whatever you do to relax. Relaxing is key: it helps your mind to dig deeper into yourself and concentrate.
When you are comfortable, visualize the change you want to make, and use the most positive wording you can. Figure out what it is you want to see in your life and burn a positive image of it in your mind’s eye. To get the best results, don’t use negative wording. Don’t use words like can’t or won’t; those words will get in the way of getting you where you want to go.
Avoid telling yourself things like, I want to be…. Say to yourself instead, I already am (what I want to be). I used that approach. I visualized myself in completely good health as if I’d never had a stroke, and doing the things I did before. It didn’t make me perfectly fine right away; those things take time and I still have a ways to go, but I am far ahead of schedule in my recovery as my brain works to restore my mind and body.
Here’s another example. If your goal is losing weight, you want to avoid phrasing things like, I won’t overeat. It’s pretty hard to visualize not overeating without visualizing overeating in some way and defeating the purpose. Instead, try telling yourself things like, I eat a balanced diet every day. I eat sensible portions of healthy food for every meal and I exercise every day. I’m slim and trim and I feel great. Visualize people telling you how great you look. See yourself as already being what you want to become and have no doubts you will get there. Doubt short circuits your efforts.
Our minds (or brains) are there to help us achieve what we visualize. What we tell ourselves will last a lifetime until that message is replaced by a better (or worse) one.
We see examples of this at work all the time. Examples: A child who is told he/she is no good will visualize being no good and grow up believing and behaving that way.
That’s kind of how these things work. It comes across like a New Age-y slogan: Think it and be it. But it’s not so much about positive thinking, as it is about positive-being.
I find it works best to visualize your goal as something you already have. Have absolute confidence it will come to be. That’s what I was doing while I was in the hospital and it has certainly helped my recovery..
I suggest using varying points of view in your affirmation. Here’s an example, using myself as the object:
- First person point of view: I, Isaac, am an excellent writer.
- Second person point of view: Isaac,you are an excellent writer.
- Third person point of view: Boy, that Isaac sure is an excellent writer.
Here’s more. Using the example above as a writer, sometimes to make my work more individualized, I visualize part of myself flowing through my fingers, to my keyboard, and into my words. in an effort to give my writing a more personal feel and flow.
I won’t become a better writer overnight, but I’m confident I will get there gradually and eventually. Meanwhile, my mind will set up the conditions that will allow me to be a better and better writer.
It could be directing me, behind the scenes, to do things like spend more time developing a concept before I write a single word, figuring out where I want a written piece to go and what the message is, cleaning up typos, tightening my grammar and syntax,and more. It might even lead me to change the way I think about writing, or to eliminate mental blocks that keep me from being as good at my craft as I am able. It may lead me to not try to force my work, but to allow it to happen.
Visualize your goal every day. That helps fix the goal in your mind’s eye and gives your mind (or brain) the focus you need to make it happen. Burn the image of what you want firmly in your mind and your mind will work to lead you to the steps you need to get there. I believe this gets to the heart of why so many New Year’s resolutions don’t work: they lack the necessary degree of commitment.
Visualizing change will work to effect change in yourself, but not to directly affect someone else. It can help you behave in a way that might influence someone else, though.
Let’s say there is someone with whom you don’t get along at the office, for example. You might visualize the two of you sitting at a table, having a pleasant chat. If it’s what you are telling your brain, you may find yourself behaving in ways that will make that person want to talk to you. In other words, you can’t change someone else’s behavior, but you can change your own to fit pretty much any situation.
As for affirmations, I think it might be helpful to write your positive affirmations down every day for a few days, to keep them in the front of your mind and in your consciousness, until it sinks in and becomes part of your being. This will reinforce your real commitment to that goal.
This all may sound like magic, and it kind of is magic, but not in a fictional, storybook kind of way. It’s having more power over yourself and your circumstances.
![]() | Isaac Peterson grew up on an Air Force base near Cheyenne, Wyoming. After graduating from the University of Wyoming, he embarked on a career as an award-winning investigative journalist and as a semi-professional musician in the Twin Cities, the place he called home on and off for 35 years. He doesn’t mind it at all if someone offers to pick up his restaurant tab and, also, welcomes reader comments. Email him at isaac3rd@gmail.com. Read more articles by Isaac here; https://www.brainenergysupportteam.org/archives/tag/isaac-peterson |
Save the Date: Cognicon 2022 Fall 2022!
This fall, Cognicon returns! Save the date for October 14-15, 2022 for a virtual event that is like no other!
For those not familiar with Cognicon, the event was started in 2019. This virtual cognitive convention is designed to share information about brain health, wellness, self-care, empowerment, and supportive communities and programs in the virtual platform of Second Life.
There is no charge to attend and all are welcome!
As we get closer, we’ll be posting more information on what to expect and how you take part.
In the meantime, if you are new to Second Life, we highly encourage you to join BEST in Second Life today! It’s free to visit, explore and take part in activities and events. Click here to learn more and how you can get started.
Just a Headache?
Recently, one of my housemates has been complaining daily about severe headaches. I’ve urged him to see a doctor, but he won’t do it.
Although headaches are a rarity with me, since my acquired traumatic brain injury, I’m a bit leery when it comes to headaches.
I haven’t been able to reach my housemate, but maybe I can help somebody who might see my words. The information I’m about to catalog is from the Mayo Clinic and Harvard Medical websites, but shouldn’t be taken as medical advice—see a doctor for that.
Headaches are classified as primary and secondary.
Common primary headaches are:
- Cluster headaches, several headaches in one day.
- Tension headaches, caused by stress and happen when the neck and shoulders become tense.
- Cough headaches are triggered by coughing and other types of strain, like laughing, sneezing or nose-blowing.
- Exercise headaches happen during or immediately after physical activity.
There are other primary types of headaches, but most can be treated with aspirin, acetaminophen, or ibuprofen. Different types of primary headaches can be dealt with by improving posture, avoiding excess alcohol, not skipping meals, getting enough sleep, or avoiding processed foods that contain nitrates.
Many people with brain injuries experience some type of headaches, and hopefully the cause will be diagnosed and treated during the course of treatment for their brain injury.
I almost forgot to mention so-called ice cream headaches or brain freeze. They are actually primary headaches, and although they can be kind of intense, they usually only last a few seconds and are not serious.
Secondary headaches, on the other hand, are something to be more concerned about.
Secondary headaches can be symptoms of disorders that can activate pain-sensitive nerves in the head and can lead to real damage or death.
Some types of secondary headaches can result from:
- Acute nasal and sinus infection.
- Blood clots in the brain.
- Brain tumors.
- Tears in the walls of arteries or aneurysms.
- Carbon monoxide poisoning.
- Arteriovenous malformation (AVM). AVM happens when groups of blood vessels form incorrectly (I have personal experience with AVM and can vouch they can lead to strokes).
- Meningitis.
- Medication overuse.
- Spinal headaches, caused by low pressure in, or low volume of cerebrospinal fluid.
There are many, many other types of headaches; these are just a few.
It is near impossible to always know the cause of a headache, but they all have one thing in common: if the headache is severe and chronic, you will want to see a doctor to figure out what’s wrong. Your brain is trying to tell you something, and a doctor, especially a neurologist, can tell you what it’s saying.
You may need an MRI, CT scan, EEG or other type of diagnostic tool. They are expensive, and they may not turn up anything, but if you value your life, you will get medical attention or risk paying a steeper cost, not measured in dollars.
I can think of two people, one famous, the other one not so much, who didn’t get medical attention and paid dearly for it.
The first one, the famous one, was Laura Branigan, who sang the hit song Gloria. Laura had intense headaches for more than a week and never got it checked out. She died in her sleep from a brain aneurysm.
The other one, the not-famous one, is me. I had bad headaches and vertigo and tried to treat it with aspirin, right up until a major stroke happened, the result of an AVM aggravated by undiagnosed high blood pressure.
Like everything I write these days, there is much more to this subject than what I’ve passed along. The main point here is to listen to your brain—it can be trying to give you a serious warning that something is very wrong.
I just hope my housemate sees this and gets looked at. Maybe there’s nothing seriously wrong, but why take chances?
![]() | Isaac Peterson grew up on an Air Force base near Cheyenne, Wyoming. After graduating from the University of Wyoming, he embarked on a career as an award-winning investigative journalist and as a semi-professional musician in the Twin Cities, the place he called home on and off for 35 years. He doesn’t mind it at all if someone offers to pick up his restaurant tab and, also, welcomes reader comments. Email him at isaac3rd@gmail.com. Read more articles by Isaac here; https://www.brainenergysupportteam.org/archives/tag/isaac-peterson |